Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The 10th of May



Today is a hard day. Today is the day that I lost my grandmother. Oh, she did not die completely on this day--her body hovered for another four days before it finally figured out she was gone. Not only do I have this anniversary to mourn, but I have to do so without the comfort of a cat.

Why is this a big deal, you may ask?

All of my life I have had a fuzzy comforter to bury my face in the fur and sob. Better than any Kleenex as a tissue is discarded and a cat purs, licks your face, and loves you in return. In order to move in with my husband's family, I had to give my cat, Ginger, away to a loving home. I see pictures of her (thank goodness for Facebook friends!) but I miss her as well.

My entire last year feels as if it is one of nothing but loss. I lost two grandparents and my cat. I lost my job and my independence. I lost my ability to provide for my family and I lost my self-esteem. (Like I had much to begin with...)

So depressing as this is, these are the thoughts consuming me. I will hug one of my daughter's stuffed kitties, sniffle into Kleenex, and mourn like most of the world.

You never realize your own strength until you have to learn how to mourn without the comfort of a cat...

5 comments:

  1. I too, have faced grief without my furry comfort this year. All I can do is offer an understanding hug and reassure you that God is in control and to keep your chin up. Love you.

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  2. Sis, I am sorry for all the loss you have had to endure this past year, but please remember you have not been alone, although at times I know you must have felt like it. You have friends and family who love you very much, but most importantly God has always been there with you every step of the way. Phil 4:13.

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  3. Love you! Wish I could be there for you:( <3 Sissy #2

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  4. God strengthens us during the rough periods of our lives. Isaiah 41:10 fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

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  5. I will remember tis for the rest of my life sis, as the whole family will. I will always be here for anytime or day of the week. Love you alots, Sweet Pea.

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