As it stands, it is 6 am (central time) and I have been up nearly twenty-four hours. Perhaps not surprisingly, I am not really very tired either.
Stupid insomnia...
Why the venture into watching the sky darken and then lighten again with the rising of a new day? No, not for obvious reasons--or, rather, not just for those reasons. Added to the difficulty that I cannot seem to sleep without medicinal help (see my blog post in April about Insomnia), I had the added bonus of the fact that my husband wishes to visit the local unemployment office as soon as they open (8 am for those who do not know) so he can "beat the crowd".
...Sad that in our affluent society we have a "crowd" at the unemployment office...
But I digress...
Anyway, in order to make sure that I did not miscalculate with the medication (which requires eight hours of sleep before it releases you) and so I can watch our daughter while he does his errand, it required that I not attempt to sleep at all. What a disaster it would be if I had fallen asleep and could not awaken to allow him to leave as he had planned! (I say disaster as we have extremely recently had a...disagreement...about what insomnia is and his lack of understanding about how it affects someone--I would not want to invite the argument that would ensue!) Much simpler, therefore, to just stay awake.
His parents do not understand. His mother thinks I am awake simply because I could not "get away from" the computer (oh the look I received when she came down the stairs and saw me awake!). His father is more guarded in his expressions, and is usually infinitely more kind toward me, so I cannot venture for a certainty on what he is thinking.
Which leads into my other prevalent thought: I am getting very frustrated with our living situation. I have been invited to a second job interview on Thursday for someplace that I very much would like to be employed, doing a job that I would very much like to do.
May God grant me the ability to secure this job so we may soon move into our own home once again!!!!
...
Wait. Wow, did I veer off at the last moment! See? This proves what I was originally going to make a statement about: I had no problems staying up with no consequences when I was eight years younger. Now that I am approaching thirty I am finding that my mind becomes jelly the longer I am awake, instead of sharper. A strong cafe mocha loaded with sugar and plenty of caffeine, and I was ready to face a full day of college classes. Today I will be thankful if I am able to string a coherent sentence together!
Oh for the days of being younger!
Youth is wasted on the young, no doubt about it. It's a shame wisdom doesn't come until we're no longer as resilient.
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